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[vermax]

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jacaerys

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[provoke]

And Rhaenyra does not judge you for it.

[ he supposes she wouldn't, considering, and dragonstone is not king's landing. tongues wag less there, he assumes; he's never stayed in their ancestral home for too long. ]

My interests have leaned more to men lately, as it happens. Edwin is a friend to Pierce. He gave his bedroom table to your man.

[vermax]

I do not believe so. The tight grip of the Faith does not reach Dragonstone. ( and the old gods of valyria are less worried about shame. plus, his mother has little ground to stand on if his own intuition is correct. )

I am aware of their friendship. Pierce and Tim then? Others? So I may know to not overstep.

[provoke]

[ their mothers and their secrets — not that aemond has room to talk. ]

Lauralae. She is dear to me, and if you should harm her I will not stand in her way. Ser Armand, among the vampires, though ours is not so much a physical arrangement as... sharing a common interest. Avoid him for my sake all the same, if you won't mind. Taggie O'Hara, recently arrived; I find her refreshing to speak with.

[ he leaves off daemon's name, and alia's, each for reasons he thinks jace would understand if he knew. written down, though - aemond is struck with a peculiar feeling. ]

I did not expect to have these many names to give you.

[vermax]

I do not know any of them. You have no reason to worry, cousin.

( there are more on his own list, but he does not mention them all the same. Alia is a complicated matter, a night shared with Alina does not give him a claim. )

Does it worry you?

[provoke]

Mother bid me not sire bastards, but I would think that goes for the both of us regardless.

[ it is odd, to have a conversation so frank and seeming banal as a discussion of lovers with jace. unthinkable, just weeks ago — but now? ]

She's not happy with the choices I've made. Not the men, I think she pretends not to know — but my choosing Tim, as if I chose him specially to hurt her.

I could never consider anything like this for myself back home. We are both of us betrothed, and honour demands we uphold such promises.

[vermax]

Of course. I am not surprised that is the lesson imparted, given your mother's thoughts on bastards. ( he's known it as long as he could remember; before he knew what it truly meant, the condemnation that it was. )

To aim to please our parents in all matters is a folly. Your heart has made a choice, has it not? You are a man grown and it is your right. I cannot claim to know much of Queen Alicent's mind or heart, but her love for you runs fierce and will triumph over any unhappiness over your choices.

Honour and duty demand many things of us. May I ask a question of you? An honest one.

[provoke]

[ was it not true? aemond doesn't reply with it, knowing how sore the matter is for jace, just as the matter of his eye and lucerys's death would be for himself and the both of them. but he knows what jace means; alicent holds to the teachings of the faith as a man might hold a weapon, or a shield. he can neither fault alicent for her beliefs, or jace for his upset. ]

She means well, and always for the realm. Her loyalty to the crown as she understands it cannot be questioned.

You may ask, but you'll allow me the grace to refuse an answer. I've not lied to you. I won't start now.

[vermax]

( he has his own opinions on Alicent's loyalty, on her devotion to the realm. but to argue with Aemond on it will lead them nowhere but back from the delicate peace they've established and promised to keep. )

Of course. You need not answer. I will not lie and say it is not a complicated question:

Are you happier here?

[provoke]

[ he's been thinking about it. he's been wondering if this might be better, to let their bitter rivalry die here and have them return home knowing the peace they're giving up. but any happiness here won't bring back the dead. it won't resolve any of the issues left lingering, won't heal the wounds that still hurt and burn and ache in their hearts. ]

Home is where I can fly freely with Vhagar, and Vhagar is where my happiness lies.

Any joy I feel here will never be complete without her.

[vermax]

Even at home, we are not always free to fly.

And if she were here?

[provoke]

[ if she were here, free to do as she pleases? free to roam the skies, with him on her saddle? ]

What would your answer be?

[vermax]

That I could be. If only for a brief moment in time. ( if he could forget the weight of all the loss, the fear of what lay ahead and anger toward what it had come to. and if victory came, his mother on the throne as meant to be, if his claim would see no turmoil when the Stranger came for her at the end of her life. )

[provoke]

I think I could be, too.

[ to live a quieter life, left alone to textbooks and silence and training, to let his mind chase after histories and languages and become someone greater than the borrowed things that he has become. and maybe — distant as a fading dream — find someone who will choose him first, even when he doesn't ask.

death waits for him when they return. he knows this. he welcomes it just as much as he fears it. fire and blood only wait to drown him in its unending fire. ]

[vermax]

Then let us find comfort in that.

And deem the things that make it possible worth fighting for.

[provoke]

You hold to peace as if it will hold. Your optimism surprises, cousin.

But why not, as you say. We don't have anything better to do.

[vermax]

For another moon, at least.

[provoke]

Mm. 'Tis your name day soon, as well.

Do you have plans for it?

[vermax]

I would spend it hunting, if I could. But I believe my mother is making plans that will overshadow the occasion.

[provoke]

I'm happy to hear for you, truly. With Baela and Daemon?

I haven't thanked you for reaching out to Tim and Pierce as you had. You didn't need to do that for my sake.

[vermax]

And the whole of the manor.

There is no need to thank me. Did you enjoy the celebrations?

*happy to hear this for you, oof

[provoke]

[ a public wedding, then. as much a soft power move as any; clever.

and did he enjoy it? daemon's attendance comes to mind. tim's warmth, the morning earlier. lauralae's dress, the dance they shared and after. pierce, under the stars. ]

I had a good time. Thank you, truly.

[vermax]

Then I am glad for you. Do not feel indebted to me for it.

[provoke]

And yet.

I'll repay the thoughtfulness, Jacaerys. Allow me the privilege of it.

[vermax]

( well, if Aemond insists then the part of Jace that wishes to be given offerings will not protest. ) If you insist, cousin, I will grant you the pleasure.

[provoke]

[ he has a gift picked out, after all. why shouldn't he give it to its intended? ]

How generous of my cousin Jacaerys, that he allows me to witness him so.

You will tell me when I can come by to give my favour?